I don't do this sort of thing that often, but I had a particularly memorable experience, so here I go:
The missus and I are incurable brunch machines. We don't eat dinner out that often, but we eat brunch out at least once a week. Often twice. We're not crazy, we just like eggs. And coffee. And the occasional flapjack.
So our neighbors tell us about this place called "Viva" in Red Hook (Brooklyn). It's tex-mex and apparently it's not half bad. Now we're both californios and have pretty much given up on good Mexican food in New York. But we still hold out hope for decent Mexican food.
So we head to Red Hook (a feat-but we are the rare New Yorkers with a car, so it's not so hard). We see that Viva has a sign up and from the looks of the sign, the place is gonna be alright.
But it ain't. We walk in and the joint's empty. The host/waiter looks astonished to see anyone in there. So be it. We order coffee. He informs us that they don't have coffee. I silence the obvious rejoinder "then you don't serve brunch, do you?" Instead we order our chilaquiles and I walk out the door and up the street to grab some coffee from Baked.
I get back and we eventually get our chilaquiles. When done right, chilaquiles is god's own dish. It's best described as breakfast nachos, but it's way better than nachos ever could be. It is nothing less than the perfect Mexican breakfast. And in the face of huevos rancheros and huevos a la mexicana, that's saying something. But these chilaquiles were not. done. right. Not even close. The soggy slop that was put in front of us would have caused a duel in less civilized times.
We ate as much as we could choke down, waited to see our waiter again (never did-I'm pretty sure he felt the appropriate amount of shame at laying that crap in front of us) and eventually left a little cash and booked.
Not cool. Let me put this as plainly as I can: IF YOU DO NOT SERVE COFFEE YOU DO NOT GET TO ADVERTISE YOURSELF AS A BRUNCH ESTABLISHMENT. And if you serve sloppy, floppy, nasty crap and call it chilaquiles, you should be ashamed of yourself.